Three Things to Remember When Publishing a Memoir

In this guest author post, memoirist Amy Sazama, author of Fleetwood Dreams, reflects on her own writing, publishing, and promoting experience. 

In 2024, I am publishing my memoir Fleetwood Dreams, recounting growing up and including the tragic loss of my mom and murder of my twin brother. The whole process, from starting to write to publishing and then on to promotion, was a lot. A lot of healing. A lot of tears. A lot of big feelings. Reflecting back, here are three pieces of advice I have for anyone else who is looking to publish a memoir. 

1. Practice Self-Care—You’ll Need It

I speak from personal experience in saying that bearing your entire life and soul for the world to read isn’t easy. Writing, publishing, and promoting a memoir means reliving some very difficult experiences that aren’t so easy to re-live. Memoirists expose a piece of our hearts, and then sit back while the world reads and judges our stories.

So when preparing for this, make sure you are ready to care for yourself. Take moments to relax and calm down, especially when those big feelings come out. Feel free to take a nap, plan a vacation, eat some chocolate, or phone a friend. Maybe schedule a therapy appointment too, because it’s great to process those big feelings with someone disconnected from the events. 

2. Remember Your Reason Why

Most people write a memoir because they have something important to say. They have a story they feel others will want to hear and connect to. Maybe they want to share their story so others feel less alone. Maybe writing their story was cathartic for them. Maybe it was for entertainment purposes. Or maybe (like in my case) it was to give others a little bit of “hope” in a world that can use a little more. Whatever your reason, remember your “why.”

Stick to this reason during interviews, Q&A’s, book signings, author events, etc. People might also want to share their experiences with you now (because you’ve made a connection— GO YOU!). People might want to give you a hug (because now they see you in a different light than before), and people will write many different reviews. It’s important to remember none of their opinions are a judgement of your worthiness as an author (let alone your worth as a person). They say nothing about your reasons why. 

3. Vulnerability is Strength

You just allowed yourself to be vulnerable. As Brené Brown says, “Vulnerability isn’t about winning or losing. It’s having the courage to show up when you can’t control the outcome.” It’s normal to feel panicky, uncertain, or scared. You just did something courageous. You just did something that most people won’t do. You let yourself be vulnerable. Remember this through your moments of fear: “You jumped in the arena instead of watching from the stands”. Be proud of your accomplishment. You never know who you will be touched by your story.

It’s been almost a year since my book came out, and I’m growing more and more comfortable talking about it. I also have gathered, through all my events and interviews, real evidence that putting hope into the world and sharing my story does help people feel less alone. If you are working on a memoir, no matter where you are in the process, keep that in mind. If even one person feels less hopeless, less alone because of your work, then you’ve made the world a better place by sharing your story. Go you!

Have you written a memoir, or done other writing that is personal? How did it feel? What were some hard parts? Some easy parts? Share your thoughts in the comments!