Whoa Writing: Too Many People!
From time to time, I like to reflect on lessons learned from reading through the 350–400 submissions we receive each year. There are patterns that emerge that offer guidance for writers looking to make their writing stand out. This periodic series of posts shares observations based on these experiences.
You know that song Too Many People from Paul and Linda McCartney’s album Ram? Great album!
Too many people going underground
Too many reaching for a piece of cake
Too many people pulled and pushed around
Too many waiting for that lucky break
I think about that song whenever I get to a point in a book and say, “Wait, who’s this person?”
Of course, after saying that and humming the melody of the song, I castigate myself. Obviously I should have been paying better attention! I must have let my mind wander, or was falling asleep when the character was introduced so didn’t realize I was missing something.
Or maybe… there are too many people in the book!
How can we tell there are too many people? There are a few things I look for.
1. Are all characters in the book distinct?
Do they have unique backstories, personalities, behavioral tendencies, speaking patterns, looks, preferences, relationships to the protagonist, and so on? Defining all of these things is really hard work! You have to know your characters and cast them lovingly, flaws (especially flaws!) and all. Because of how hard this is, authors can slip into the trap of duplicating a character to serve a plot point. It’s better to rework the plot a little than it is to introduce another character who exists only to solve a problem.
2. How many characters enter the story at the halfway point or beyond?
As a general rule of thumb, the first third of the book establishes the events of the remaining two-thirds, so if we’re meeting a new character midway through the story, there had better be a good reason! We can assess the number of characters who are showing up halfway or more and then ask, “Are they there only to solve a problem?” The later in the book a character is introduced, the more likely it is that they are only a plot device.
3. How many characters exit the story before the end?
Similar to point 2, are characters introduced only to be forgotten by the end of the book? When reflecting back on the story, is the reader ever stuck wondering, “Whatever happened to that guy?” It’s easy to leave characters by the wayside when their purpose in the book is fulfilled. Careful plotting should allow most characters to have some resolution, perhaps even coming together at the end of the book. If a character is important enough to be named and defined, then we don’t want to let them go.
4. Do the characters only serve to “make a believable world”?
“Because we all have a lot of people in our lives” is the best rejoinder to a criticisms about the number of characters. But it ignores the fact that we’re trying to craft a compelling story, not provide the quotidian details of day-to-day life. Books set in schools face the biggest challenge here. The student protagonist is naturally around a wide array of fellow students. Doesn’t the reader need to know about them?
The most successful approach to managing this is to group and isolate students. Harry Potter once again serves as an exemplar. Harry is naturally grouped with his house and his year, limiting his interactions with other students. He has a group of close friends who protect him from the burdens of fame. He has a primary antagonist in Draco Malfoy, who has his on coterie, but because they are grouped together, we can know them principally by reputation. The other houses are represented by their general characteristics, with few specific students named. Clusters of students help us know the key characters and allow us to have a general sense of others. Thus we can have a fully realized school without needing to know dozens of specific characters.
(Harry’s world expands in every book, and by the seventh, we do know dozens of characters! These are the tools that a master storyteller like J. K. Rowling can deploy that other authors would do well to avoid. It’s also the benefit of having telling a story over seven books. Knowing all those characters by the end of one book would leave the reader confused.)
It’s worth noting one last piece to consider with character counts: Sometimes we need more characters because there’s strength in numbers. An example from Harry Potter: Why does Draco need both Crabbe and Goyle? Aside from the Draco + 2 and Harry + 2 symmetry of their friends, we need the two brutes because they make Draco seem more dangerous. A bad guy with two henchman should be feared more than a bad guy with one.
Any why Fred and George? They’re funnier together and represent the exasperation of Mrs. Weasley. But there’s also two because great writers break the “rules.” While an editor like me is busy editing, authors should get busy writing and telling the story they need to tell, even if the character count is likely to raise an eyebrow or two.
Are there books you’ve read where you felt the cast was too large? Times you’ve combined characters or cut one altogether? Share your thoughts in the comments!